Cartwheels
jo Crosby
Here’s my Girl Talk Counseling Tip for the day: Lead with the Cartwheel.
What does that mean?
Leading with the Cartwheel means to give your heart permission to flip, delight in, and handspring towards your husband. It means making a choice to greet and engage your spouse with love, kindness, enthusiasm, and smiles. It means making an effort to demonstrate the deep well of thanksgiving you hold for him. It means purposely being giddy, sexy, and available when he walks into the room. It means silencing the need to needlessly complain, gripe, or quarrel. It means harnessing a bitter heart and guarding the words that leave your mouth. Leading with the Cartwheel means beginning encounters with being his delight and having an attitude focused on building a strong, Christ-centered marriage.
Too often, as women, we lead with nagging, whiny behavior. We start conversations with words that drip of defensiveness, defeat, and despair. We joke about the honey-do list; we focus on all the chores not completed; and we bicker. We both pester him and then also fester in dissatisfaction. We belittle ourselves, discount our beauty, and refuse to accept compliments. We snub touches and invitations to play. We lead with criticisms instead of cartwheels.
A cartwheel, by definition, is an athletic, gravity-defying, feat in which the whole body works as a unit to change direction and present itself in a “circular sideways handspring with the arms and legs extended”. Wow! Even as a mental visual, a cartwheel is hard to mistake. They are noticeable.
In relationships, Leading with the Cartwheel will take practice. Communicating and interacting this way will require focus and determination. It entails choice. It may mean altering your words and your walk?!!?
Thankfully, God is invested in transforming your heart; he directs our steps; tames the tongue; and invites us to follow him. He walks in love – extravagant love.
Perhaps you never mastered pulling a cartwheel off in real time, or maybe your younger self could manage one, but your older self is full of doubts. Here is some good news for you: Everybody Can Do Relationship Cartwheels! They are easier than they look; they’re fun, noticeable, and doable. And, they will change the tone and trajectory of your relationship.
Do you think I am zealous?
Maybe I am. I have invested deeply into reaching for the marriage God designed for me. I have made the choice to stop buying the garbage the world is selling; I want the Word of God to be my guide; and I am determined to teach others to do the same.
Consider the truth of Scripture:
“Better to live alone in a tumble down shack than share a mansion with a nagging spouse.” Proverbs 21:9
“A nagging spouse is like the drip, drip, drip of a leaky faucet; You can’t turn it off, and you can’t get away from it.” Proverbs 27:15
“Better to live in a tent in the wild than with a cross and petulant spouse.” Proverbs 21:19
“Better to live alone in a tumble down shack than share a mansion with a nagging spouse.” Proverbs 25:24
Be a blessing to your husband; Lead with the Cartwheel.
Grace and Peace,
Jo
* Scripture taken from the Message